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Once again Ashen Hawk found himself wandering from the tower, his feet leading him through the snow covered forest. As always, he found himself just walking above the ground, even though that didn’t happen when he was standing still, and never in the tower. Eventually, Ashen Hawk found himself surrounded snowdrop flowers, with the ruins of a building farther back in the field. Staring at the flowers, he recalled the fact that their meaning was one of hope and rebirth. Ashen Hawk, though, felt nothing but feel nostalgic for something he couldn’t remember when he saw them. This elusive memory might have been important, but it always slipped from his mind like melting snow.

 

The nostalgia, though, would quickly be followed by intense waves of grief and longing. Both caused by whatever it was he’d forgotten; and how could he feel these emotions when the memory wasn’t there? No matter what Ashen Hawk did, he couldn’t pull whatever it was to the forefront of his mind. The effort would usually leave him feeling exhausted, standing in that field of snowdrops and pondering how similar they were. Both were immortal, unaffected by the passage time (even though the flowers should have been dead because of the snow) and despite the meaning of the flowers, none of them had brought an ounce of hope to anyone.

 

After minutes, days, hours (and what did time mean to a ghost?), had passed, Ashen Hawk would feel normal enough to make his way back to the tower. That was another place that brought up feelings he couldn’t explain. He’d woken up there one day, with no idea who he was or how he’d gotten there. He stayed because he felt like something was keeping him there, despite how lonely he constantly felt. And then one day, Jed appeared and everything changed.

 

Jed had brought a lot of light to his life, and in return he did what he could to make her life easier. Ashen Hawk, after not taking care of himself for so long, decided to leave maintaining the tower to Jed, at first because he didn’t know what to do and then because it was just their routine. So instead, Ashen Hawk did his best to give her emotional support.

 

“Jed, you really should consider wearing a shorter dress,” Ashen Hawk said with a grin.

 

Even with her back turned, he knew Jed was scowling as she pushed the hem of her dress back down. She’d only been wearing it and the accompanying blonde wig for a week, but she seemed to be getting more used to wearing both of them.

 

“You know, if you have enough time to stare then maybe you should be helping with the chores,” Jed said as she spun around to face him.

 

“Oh no, I could never,” Ashen Hawk said, placing his hand over his heart, “as a ghost, I’m more likely to mess something up. Instead, I shall endeavor to stay out of your way.”

 

With that, Ashen Hawk moved over to one of their chairs and flopped down, all without looking over at Jed. He’d contemplated closing his eyes for a more dramatic effect, but Jed might not have appreciated that. Plus, he might have ended up on the floor instead, and wouldn’t that be embarrassing?

 

“Honestly, Master,” Jed said while making her way toward him, “can’t you put in some effort at all?”

 

“Well…..I suppose I could straighten up,” Ashen Hawk said, trying to think of anything he’d realistically be able to do.

 

Jed opened her mouth, immediately closed it again, and then turned away from him while releasing a sigh. Ashen Hawk knew she’d probably expected more, but for reasons he couldn’t explain, he couldn’t go into town and thus could only do small things around the tower. He knew that disappointed her at times, just as it immensely frustrated him, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it.

 

“Hold on, is that a… snowdrop flower?” Jed asked, quickly moving towards the door.

 

Ashen Hawk turned his head, lifting up off the chair as he did so. Sure enough, there was one lone snowdrop flower sitting on the floor of the tower. He wasn’t sure how it had gotten in here, because he’d never had anything stick to or attach itself to his clothing before, so how?

 

“I’ve never seen one in person before, but I’ve read all about them,” Jed said, bending to pick the flower up. “The book said that they stand for hope, and the coming of spring.”

 

“Is that really even important? It is just a flower after all.” Ashen Hawk said, doing his best to ignore the flower.

 

Jed looked at him briefly before putting the flower down on the shelf above the fireplace. “Well in our town where it constantly snows, seeing a fully grown flower shows that there is the potential for something to change. Maybe it won’t happen right away, but I believe it’s a sign that something is going to happen soon. Something good.”

 

In the moment’s after Jed made her brief speech, neither of them said anything, allowing the silence to fill the space between them. Ashen Hawk hadn’t expected her to get so passionate about a flower, especially one that stood for change. This was mostly due to Jed’s habit of avoiding anything that might draw unnecessary attention to herself.

 

“Right,” Jed said breaking the silence. “I’m going back into town to finish work. I’ve left some food for lunch, and hopefully I’ll be back in time to make dinner.”

 

“Of course, and thank you for the food,” Ashen Hawk said, shooting her a small smile.

 

“And try not to make a mess of the place while I’m gone,” Jed said, halfway out the door when she’d made that comment.

 

Ashen Hawk said no more, mainly because she was gone by the time he stood up from his chair. As he sat down to eat the lunch Jed had left for him, he couldn’t help but grin widely. Even though Jed got frustrated with him at times, and liked to make snarky comments, he knew she held some affection for him. Living with Jed made him feel peaceful in a way he’d not felt since first waking up in the tower. Being able to live with her and hear about the work she did in town, made him believe that something might be changing within the town. Whether that would be good or bad he couldn’t really say. What Ashen Hawk did know though, was that for the first time in his life, he felt hopeful about the future. While he was stuck in place, forever unaffected by the flow of time, Jed embodied what the snowdrop flower meant. He knew that Jed would be the one to bring hope and rebirth to their snowy town, and Ashen Hawk hoped he’d be alive to see that happen.

Hope in All its Forms

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